2002-10-09 - 12:20 p.m.
Ok, I'm alright, I will not freak ... eeeeee
:: too late
eeeep (boom)
:: heh, you are such a spaz.
huff puff ... (sticks out tongue)
:: come on now, what is the vow?
(rolls eyes) I vow to see every ... something ... as a direct communication between myself and the Universe. But that doesn't mean I have to like it.
:: Indeed, no one ever said that. In fact, it is almost guaranteed that as you walk the path you will be faced with some of the most uncomfortable situations you can imagine. But the point is that it is your challenge staring you in the face. It is your opportunity to escape your old and outdated subroutines. There's that ritual, right? Where you feed all of your fears ...
Come to the dance. Come all you whom I owe, who I have harmed, who desire anything of me. Come to the dance. Come to this dance beaten out on humility, hope, and fear.
:: Yeah. So, you have your fears here trying to consume you, to consume the parts of you that are most tasty to the fear. And they keep those parts, keep them from growing because as soon as you grow out of the fear it starves. And everything in this Universe wants to survive, *everything* has that instinct in it. So you offer up yourself and anything they want. If they want attention, sex, money, size 6 jeans, you give it to them until they are glutted ... and eventually they learn that they will not starve or are satisfied and go.
Come and be satisfied. This is my body which is given up for you.
::But then the practical side of that, the side that you must walk with everyday is the actual showing. Showing the parts of you that have gotten caught up on the thorns of past hurts or disappointments that their needs will be fulfilled. That is your everyday thing. To show the 4, 12, 23, and 26 year old you that the patterns that used to protect those hurts have become fears and, rather than protecting, are allowing those parts to hide and atrophy. And to show them that it's time to grow up. Which is the other thing ...
What? You mean it won't happen right away? I can't just say "this is the truth" and everything will be all right?
:: No. How long did it take you to learn to talk? Walk? Eat? Flirt?
(smiles) Still learning that last one ...
:: Hush. My point is that the learning process is slow. You learn, you forget, you drill, you learn, you retain, you forget. But, pretty soon, you start doing it without thinking about it and you'll wake up one day thinking "didn't this used to bother me?" to which I will reply "yep, but it doesn't now ... COFFEE!!!"
Goddamnit, Pip, I never liked you!
:: Why, because I'm right?
Bleh ...
:: Uh huh. Think of it this way, the more you do this, and the more the world doesn't freakin' end, the less you will be afraid of it. The first time is always hard.
humph ...
:: I can see that I'm not going to get an enthusiastic reaction out of you. Fine, be a brat. But you know I'm right and, eventually, you will love me for it.
Well .... just .... fine then. Back to work, you! (whip crack)
::Bleh yourself ...
Take Care
M
(again, the quote is long)
"And a man said, "Speak to us of Self-Knowledge."
And he answered, saying:
Your hearts know in silence the secrets of the days and the nights.
But your ears thirst for the sound of your heart's knowledge.
You would know in words that which you have always know in thought.
You would touch with your fingers the naked body of your dreams.
And it is well you should.
The hidden well-spring of your soul must needs rise and run murmuring to the sea;
And the treasure of your infinite depths would be revealed to your eyes.
But let there be no scales to weigh your unknown treasure;
And seek not the depths of your knowledge with staff or sounding line.
For self is a sea boundless and measureless.
Say not, "I have found the truth," but rather, "I have found a truth."
Say not, "I have found the path of the soul." Say rather, "I have met the soul walking upon my path."
For the soul walks upon all paths.
The soul walks not upon a line, neither does it grow like a reed.
The soul unfolds itself, like a lotus of countless petals." The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran
